Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 15, 2009
It’s the first palindromic episode number in 11 shows! AMAZING!
- Heidi and Spencer are on the show tonight, so I won’t make any jokes about the vicious interview with Al Roker this morning on The Today Show. Besides, I’m afraid that Al Roker might eat me.
- A new website called Hunch launched today, and it aims to help you make decisions by using the wisdom of other Internet users. In my testing, no matter what I tried, Hunch suggested I should go watch some porn. (So it works pretty well!)
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Tags: Al Roker, Heidi and Spencer, Hunch, porn, Today
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 12, 2009
- Former President George Bush celebrated his 85th birthday today by skydiving. It’s the first time ever that the senior Bush has been higher than W.
- Heidi Montag, from I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here, announced today that she’ll pose for Playboy, as part of the magazine’s “I’m a Talentless Hack, Get My Clothes Off of Me” issue.
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Tags: George Bush, George W. Bush, Heidi Montag, Playboy
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 11, 2009
- Sonny and Cher’s daughter Chastity has announced that she’s been undergoing treatment to become a man. Her mother Cher announced that now she plans to complete her transformation into a human.
- The World Health Organization has declared a true Swine Flue Pandemic. Yeah, they’re recommending that you block your windows and doors with bacon.
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Tags: Chastity Bono, Cher, swine flu, WHO
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 10, 2009
- Breaking news: Adam Lambert is still gay. I did not see that one coming. Almost as shocking as when he first came out, right?
- A bill in Congress would make it illegal for television commercials to be louder than TV shows themselves. So after talking to executives here at NBC, WE’RE MAKING SOME CHANGES TO LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON!
- Former Playboy playmate and Hugh Hefner’s ex Kendra Wilkinson is expecting a baby with her fiancee, Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Hank Baskett. The baby will join Kendra’s great pair of twins.
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Tags: Adam Lambert, congress, gay, Hank Baskett, Hugh Hefner, Jimmy Fallon, jokes, Kendra Wilkinson, Philadelphia Eagles, Playboy, TV
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 9, 2009
- Newt Gingrich said at a Republican fundraiser that President Obama has, quote, “already failed.” The test, of course, was “Sucking Worst Than The Last Guy.” Obama’s definitely failing at that one.
- American Idol runner-up announced today that he was gay. Yeah. In another shocker, he announced that he’s a human being. Equally remarkable, right? How totally unexpected.
- Britney Spears has announced her first ever Australian tour. It’ll be her first time showing her down under, down under.
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Tags: Adam Lambert, American Idol, Australia, Barack Obama, Britney Spears, Newt Gingrich
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 8, 2009
- Judge Sotomayor, President Obama’s nominee for the Supreme Court, broke her ankle this morning. Doctor’s are urging her to get a second opinion. And a third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth, and ninth.
- You know how Judge Sotomayor hurt her ankle? She slipped on appeal.
- If you at home are saying that you object to that joke — well, sustained.
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Tags: ankle, Sonia Sotomayor, Supreme Court
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 5, 2009
- The jobless rate has hit 9.4% here in the US. I’d tell you more, but we fired the cue card guy.
- Susan Boyle has left a clinic where she was being treated for exhaustion. Meanwhile, I’m entering a clinic for people exhausted of hearing about Susan Boyle.
- A Spanish newspaper printed photos of Italy’s prime minister hanging out naked with a bunch of also-naked women. Hey, remember when WE were the country everyone laughed at?
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Tags: economy, Italy, recession, Spain, Susan Boyle, USA
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 4, 2009
- President Obama today made a speech in Cairo, Egypt. The President’s address began, “Egyptians, tell me, why do you all walk that way?”
- After his speech was over, Obama grabbed lunch at the Infidelicatessen.
- Wal-Mart announced today that it will be hiring 20,000 more workers by the end of the year. Unfortunately, each of those workers will hold the title of “Chief Firing Officer.”
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Tags: Barack Obama, Egypt, Wal-Mart
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 3, 2009
- First, the bad news: Osama Bin Laden released a new tape today. The good news, though — it’s a sex tape. So that’s interesting. “Osama Gone Wild.” He shows some leg in this one.
- The National Enquirer is reporting that Brad and Angelina might be splitting up. If Brad leaves Angelina for one particular woman, look forward to seeing “Brad and Kate Plus 28.”
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Tags: Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Jon and Kate Plus 8, Osama Bin Laden
Posted by Lex Friedman on Jun 2, 2009
- Ukraine today reported its first case of Swine Flu. They also just heard the news about Lorena Bobbit.
- Newsweek is reporting that Americans are getting fatter during the recession. Well, duh. Can you say, Dollar Menu?
- GM is reportedly close to selling its Hummer brand to a Chinese company. The Chinese company says that once they take over, if you crash your Hummer, a fortune will pop out. (Yeah, and the fortune’s gonna say: “You will need to buy a lot more gas very soon.”)
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Tags: Chinese, fortune cookies, GM, Hummer, Lorena Bobbit, McDonald's, Newsweek, recession, swine flu, Ukraine