Jokes for Shows #106 and #107

Lex Friedman — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 21:40:40 +0000

Since Jimmy took Labor Day off, the numbers are going to start to get weird. Until now, every Friday was a multiple of five. No more!

President Obama addressed school students across America Tuesday. It marked the first time ever that Barack Obama was in front of school children and nobody made fun of his name.
Steve Jobs appeared at his first Apple event since undergoing a liver transplant a few months ago. Apple today released Liver 2.0, a new app for iPhone.
A married California lawmaker was caught on tape bragging about sexual affairs with lobbyists. Of course, the conservative Republican lawmaker was known as a “protector of family values.” Which he is, because he’s making sure the families of California don’t get screwed — just he does. A lot. By lobbyists.

Jokes for Show #17

Lex Friedman — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 23:35:38 +0000

More jokes for Jimmy’s monologue. Jimmy, you can always email me at my first initial (“L”) at lexfriedman.com, if you and your team decide you’d like to hire me.

Did you see this story? It’s unbelievable: An eighth-grader in Florida was suspended from the school bus for — this is true — passing especially rancid flatulence. It gives a whole new meaning to the term “gas crisis.” Asked about his suspension, the student said: “Man, this stinks.” But we don’t know what he was referring to.
New York Senator Charles Schumer has changed his mind, and now supports gay marriage. In a related story, Senator Charles Schumer and his longtime roommate Bob are taking an extended vacation in Vermont.
A woman in California used a fake ID and a fake check to get breast implants. Investigators say that they can’t wait to get their hands on this case.

Hire Me, Jimmy Fallon! » California

Jokes for Shows #106 and #107

Jokes for Show #17