Hire Me, Jimmy Fallon!
Lex Friedman's quest to get a job writing for Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.
 
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Jokes for Show #24

Posted by Lex Friedman on Apr 2, 2009

It’s my last day in LA, which means that tomorrow I’ll be suggesting jokes for Jimmy from his own time zone. Mr. Fallon: Could I contribute to your monologue? If I could do this as my day job, I’d have more time to polish; are you seeing any potential here? Call me!

  • CBS broadcaster Greg Gumbel is suing, saying he was tricked into taping introductions for infomercials. Gumbel is especially angry because he wanted to BUY the Sham-Wow, not appear in the ad.
  • Police in North Carolina are investigating whether a funeral home fit a 6’5″ man into his coffin by cutting off his legs. The alleged victim had no comment. (Because he’s dead.) But jeez, burials these days are apparently costing MORE than an arm and a leg.
  • A new study says that employees who spend time on Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube are happier, and thus actually more productive during the work day. The study will be published in this month’s Journal of Gigantic Lies.
  • Jupiter’s big red spot is shrinking. Scientists think it’s probably related to Atkins.

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Jokes for Show #23

Posted by Lex Friedman on Apr 1, 2009
  • UC San Diego accidentally sent out emails welcoming 29,000 high school seniors — whose applications the university had, in fact, rejected. As an act of good will, the Dean of Admissions told affected high schoolers that now they COULD attend the school. He added, “NOT!”
  • CBS has cancelled long-running soap opera “Guiding Light” after 72 years and 16,000 episodes. I KNEW they’d never last!
  • President Obama gave the Queen of England an iPod during his visit with her today. I wonder what songs are on it, though. I’m guessing, “Dancing Queen.” That’d be fitting.
  • ER will air its final episode on NBC tomorrow. Which is ironic, since now the entire network needs life support.
  • And, of course, it’s April Fool’s Day, a day when we laugh at the easily fooled, gullible people around us. Or, as former President Bush calls it, Wednesday.

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