http://hiremejimmyfallon.com Lex Friedman's quest to get a job writing for Late Night. Sat, 19 Dec 2009 13:40:34 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/03/jokes-for-show-10/ http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/03/jokes-for-show-10/#comments Fri, 13 Mar 2009 21:17:34 +0000 Lex Friedman http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/?p=61 Jimmy’s had a solid week of monologues. Here are my suggestions for tonight’s:

• This past week was the best week of 2009 for Wall Street. Yeah, they only lost eighty bajillion dollars. So congratulations, everyone!
• One day after admitting guilt in a massive Ponzie scheme, Bernie Madoff has filed an appeal asking to get out of jail. He realizes that, even though he was essentially playing with Monopoly money, he can’t use a “Get of Jail Free” card, right? If they do let him out, will they have to let him collect $200?
• Ten children at a day care center drank wiper fluid after a staffer served it from a container he thought contained Kool Aid. The kids were all fine, but then the bus driver crashed because his windshield was covered in Triple Awesome Grape.
• Michael Jackson’s 50 farewell concerts in London have sold out. Which reminds me a lot of Macaulay Culkin’s 11th birthday party. Because at both events, Michael Jackson used his mouth to make a lot of people happy.

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