Hire Me, Jimmy Fallon! » recession http://hiremejimmyfallon.com Lex Friedman's quest to get a job writing for Late Night. Sat, 19 Dec 2009 13:40:34 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9 en hourly 1 Jokes for Show #60 http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/06/jokes-for-show-60/ http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/06/jokes-for-show-60/#comments Fri, 05 Jun 2009 20:13:27 +0000 Lex Friedman http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/?p=241
  • The jobless rate has hit 9.4% here in the US. I’d tell you more, but we fired the cue card guy.
  • Susan Boyle has left a clinic where she was being treated for exhaustion. Meanwhile, I’m entering a clinic for people exhausted of hearing about Susan Boyle.
  • A Spanish newspaper printed photos of Italy’s prime minister hanging out naked with a bunch of also-naked women. Hey, remember when WE were the country everyone laughed at?
    • ]]>     http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/06/jokes-for-show-60/feed/ 0     Jokes for Show #57 http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/06/jokes-for-show-57/ http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/06/jokes-for-show-57/#comments Tue, 02 Jun 2009 21:12:19 +0000 Lex Friedman http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/?p=233
  • Ukraine today reported its first case of Swine Flu. They also just heard the news about Lorena Bobbit.
  • Newsweek is reporting that Americans are getting fatter during the recession. Well, duh. Can you say, Dollar Menu?
  • GM is reportedly close to selling its Hummer brand to a Chinese company. The Chinese company says that once they take over, if you crash your Hummer, a fortune will pop out. (Yeah, and the fortune’s gonna say: “You will need to buy a lot more gas very soon.”)
    • ]]>     http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/06/jokes-for-show-57/feed/ 0     Jokes for Show #8 http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/03/jokes-for-show-8/ http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/2009/03/jokes-for-show-8/#comments Thu, 12 Mar 2009 01:25:57 +0000 Lex Friedman http://hiremejimmyfallon.com/?p=54
  • The producers of “Sesame Street” are cutting 20 percent of its work force because of the recession. The severance package for fired employees includes two weeks’ pay, and a free toy: Bend Over And Take It Elmo.
  • Forbes reported today that the world’s billionaires are feeling the impact of the recession just like the rest of us. Apparently, they’re now buying generic yachts.
  • Two teachers in Pennsylvania have been accused of having sex with the same thirteen-year-old boy. BY the boy.
  • Apple today released a new iPod shuffle, and the button-less device actually talks to you. Which is good, because if you buy such a pretentious iPod, no one else will.
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