Jokes for Vacation Day #4

Posted by Lex Friedman on Apr 9, 2009

Jimmy’s still off, and I’m subsisting on matzah. Here come the joke suggestions for tonight’s non-existent show:

The Post Office is getting ready to launch a new stamp featuring The Simpsons. The “OJ” one comes with a free letter opener. A very, very sharp letter opener.
An eight-year study has concluded that married couples are happier before they have children, and that marital bliss and satisfaction drop after having even just one kid. The study was conducted by… Your Parents. Ouch.
French workers on strike blocked tourists from getting to the Eiffel Tower. Usually, when tourists in France are blocked, it’s from too much French cheese.

Jokes for Show #25

Posted by Lex Friedman on Apr 3, 2009

Billionaire and News Corp CEO Rupert Murdoch says that more newspapers should be charging for their online editions. Reached for comment, everyone else on the Internet disagreed with him.
The US Postal Service is cutting another 1500 jobs. The extra bad news for the employees getting laid off is that supposedly, their severance checks are all, uh, “in the mail.” That’s unfortunate.
Domino’s accidentally gave away 11,000 free pizzas on their website. Even more unfortunately for Domino’s, they had to deliver them all to Nigeria. Do you know how hard that is to do in 30 minutes?!
Iowa today became the first state in the Midwest to approve same-sex marriages. In a survey of gay couples in Iowa, BOTH of them are really excited about the new law.